Originally Posted by
chicagowife 
I have so much fear, anxiety and sadness right now I just don't know where to begin.
My biggest fear is that I will have to make good on my word and leave him and he will spiral downward.
My biggest anxiety is that I will catch him using again.
My biggest sadness is that I have lost an individual that I loved so much and I don't know if I will ever have him back.
I'm right there, with you. But it is true that we have to do what we know is right, regardless of our emotions. Best wishes to you.