Hi Holy,
I had similar thoughts as you do, just joined a few days ago and guys here not only gave me a great support but also my perspective of the "alcoholic" word changed a bit. You can read my post and replies that are very related to your problem here
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rifies-me.html
I also have problems talking about this to other people, but the fact is that at some point they will pressure you to have a drink with them and unless you will say "I don't drink" they will be keep pushing & no one is made out of stone.
I actually told my friend today, she asked me when are we going out, I said, that I would love to see her, but I don't drink cause I behave like a complete ******** & destroy my life when I do. Do you know what she said? Actually, I don't want to drink either, I also behave like an idiot and can't remember anything! Neither of us used the "alcoholic" term, but we both knew what we mean.
So maybe, after all, we are not all that different.
ps. it's also my 4th day today
) Let's keep each other strong!