This is your disease taking advantage of everything as it always does, including the basic principles of recovery. It’s resisting to allow yourself to look at your accomplishment and to feel good about them minute by minute, day by day. To really only focus on sobriety in the moment, because that’s all that matters.
Addiction takes advantage of all brain function—the good ones and the bad ones. A reasonable good one would be ‘Oh my God, I’ve got to stay the rest of my life sober.” But your disease knows that if you look at things that way, you’ll feel overwhelmed and you’ll use—and the disease loves that.
So, it’s not cognition or the fact that you just have to adjust your thinking—it’s your disease operating. The long view adds up as a result of a series of moments of sobriety. Your disease wants you to be overwhelmed; your disease wants you to look at the long horizon. I urge you not to give in.
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