How are you doing, DK?

I feel like Jeff Spicoli...

Afternoon all. The harddrive on my new laptop (less than six months old) is going up to the computer god in the sky. It should be replaced by the end of the week latest. Until then I am stuck on a family members computer. And since they don't know I post here..."clear cache" and "delete cookies" time.

That quote of ananda's that Zen posted is so true for me right now. I need to be careful not to do exactly that. Thanks for the warnings!

Well, the computer repair folks are giving me the run around. They took the shortcut and as a consquence its taking twice as long to fix the real problem.

How is everyone else doing?

Im doing ok...mom is here...always a challenge. Surgery is on Monday...a little uptight about that.

My friends have all been super supportive.

DK, SS, ZC, ZD and the rest of you....please check in. just knowing your hear is so helpful to me and it is all about me right :lmao

Hey ananda! I'm here! Having a bad night emotionally (nothing disasterous happened...I just cannot control the thoughts in my mind now) and just finished smoking a cigarrette. I feel a little better. One more day at work and then I have another day off. Hopefully I can get my apathetic butt to do some much needed housework. Try to take it easy everyone.

I'm here, yo. Been better though...

Hey, DK...I'm glad you are still here. :) I hope things get better for you soon......

I can't get over it... I just can't. :(

Hey, DK...you can always PM me or someone else if you need to.

Thanks, Bam Bam. :)

:)

hi bamb and dk! I had to go out and my moms here so i'm pretty sporatic right now....

DK...just hang on ok! :ghug

ananda...hope things go well Monday.

Try to have a good night, everyone. I think I'm getting off for the night soon.

...

hey DK

you can do this, man.

D

Sorry to see so many of us had a bad day yesterday. Hope everyone feels better today.

Well, put my two weeks notice in at work today. I hope I can work out the two weeks.

This makes two days in a row I almost walked out. I can do the job physically, but not mentally, anymore. It's an easy job....that's not the problem. It's that I'm such a loser and a failure, etc.........I'm so out of place and my brain is completely overwhelmed.... I need professional help but I can't afford it.......Sorry, this is not a coherent post.


I'm really afraid I'm close to relapsing. I'm not sure what to do. Although I’ve abused alcohol aplenty, that’s really not the problem. I used alcohol to self-medicate. I needed it everyday. I need something now. I’ve never felt right, especially before alcohol came along…Is there such a thing as normal? Probably not. I’d settle for stable.

Hi, Bam. I can sure relate to that. I've been notorious for keeping jobs until I can't stand them one more minute and consequently walking out in frustration. I need professional help too. Life is difficult and not very enjoyable when you're always hanging on to sanity by a thread. And it's hard to find good help even when you have the money, being poor makes it nearly impossible.

Yeah, DK....I don't know if I should keep on keeping my fingers crossed and hope that I get better....

...I'm just tired of feeling this way most of the time. Sure, I can fool myself sometimes...but it sure takes a lot of my energy. I also get really antsy when I'm stuck with groups of people...they really get on my nerves and all I want to do is just go away and be alone. I just can't shake the feeling that this is not how life is supposed to be, at least in terms of how my brain is supposed to be. It bothers me that I only know my experience and no one else's. I have no way to judge how bad off (or how good off) I really am. Is everyone out there just keeping up appearances?