Sober Friends Weekender -Weekenders 27 - 30 September 2019
 

:welcome

Welcome to the Weekenders :wavey:

Sober Friends. Friends who support each other when the going gets tough.

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Friends who get us, and support us over ‘bumps’ in the road.

Friends that ‘get’ us and understand how we’re feeling.

Supporting each other when the going gets tough, sharing our trials...And tribulations.

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I found my best sober friends are here on Sober Recovery. They get me. Any qualms or fears of picking up out of your control, come here, there’s always someone around 24/7.

Together we can beat it.

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If this is your first weekend sober, or many, come join us for support and chat...as we know the weekends can be a struggle sometimes. (We’re here all week too!) :)

Thanks Mags :)

D

Thanks Mags and......Shotgun!!

My SR friends are an absolute rock for me and I’d be lost without all of your support! x

Nice one on Shotgun MantaLady:)

thanks Mags. :)

Thanks Mags.

Funny thing and coincidence because the last couple of weeks I have been in contact with a lady who I had been in detox with last year.
We have had a few calls and are meeting up in November in Toulouse.

I consider her my first sober friend (in real physical life and outside SR) .
Someone who knows.

Hello to all :wavey:

Good morning friends. I'm in for another sober weekend. Or as Saou would say...

IN!

I won't be drinking anytime in the next few days. In.

Sober friends. Yeah, that would be you guys. People I spend time with IRL are drinkers. I'm old enough that people my age are mostly a once-in-a-blue-moon glass of beer or wine drinkers, so that's nice. That and I just don't go places where there is drinking as The Pastime. Nothing quite so sad as an old person at a bar mid afternoon. Oh, wait, that was me. Well, mostly at home, but still.

Thanks Mags for another wonderful weekender thread :)

IN!

Great OP Mags! It's hard to overstate the importance of friends on SR. Unless you have friends IRL who are also in recovery then they will not understand what it's like in the way people on these threads do. The same applies to medical professionals too in my opinion, they understand the physical impact and they are aware that it is caused by a malfuntion in our brain but they do not quite "get" it. For example my impression is that most GP's here in the UK suggest tapering. To a non addict that would seem totally logical but as regards to the two drugs I have personal experience of, alcohol and tobacco, tapering simply didn't work. (just to clarify, i'm not suggesting anyone disobey their doctors advice). Although I have never met them I have made some important friends on SR.

I've written about my taper many times on SR. I tapered off a 12-16 units per day habit down to zero in three days.

It worked for me, BUT I didn't try to work a long taper with planned step-downs. I wanted to quit, I used the taper as medicine. I also knew that if I had more than two drinks, I wasn't going to stop that day and would just keep drinking. So my taper was 2 on the first day, 1 drink on the second day, and a half shot of rum on the 3rd day. It was only to keep the symptoms manageable and I didn't chug the drinks, I sipped them through the day.

3 days. If I hadn't been able to do it, well, that wasn't an option. I WAS going to do it.

To be fair, I didn't know alcohol withdrawal could be dangerous. That may have influenced me in a bad way had I known that. In my case, ignorance was bliss and it ended well - maybe against all odds, but it did.

I came to SR on day three or four of clean sobriety, I think. Forums had been helpful to me in other areas of my life.

I'm in!

I have met a few people here who have become great friends. Other than the sober people I know in AA, the people here are the people who actually get it. And there's always someone here.

My remodel has hit a very minor snag. It's easily fixed, but the timing of it means I'm going to have to go an extra week with no working kitchen. The place I bought my new appliances from only delivers to my town two days a week. I had originally hoped they could deliver them next Wednesday, but things will not be ready in the kitchen by then. So the following Tuesday or Wednesday will be the earliest. Could be much worse, and I'll live.

When I stopped drinking I just stopped from around three bottles of wine a day to zero.
I was too scared /ashamed/embarrassed to tell anyone and get help, my anxiety was through the roof for quite a time., which I thought was my work and my marriage causing me the stress. I naively didn’t think it was because of stopping drinking until later.

Only when I joined SR and read other’s experiences did I realise. I was then able to start my recovery journey.

I quit cold turkey also. I had cut down some before then - I had gone from probably averaging a bottle to a bottle and a half of wine a day to not drinking every day, and drinking a little less overall, but it was still a lot, and it was probably somewhat dangerous for me to just stop. I had no idea at the time that it could be a problem. Thankfully it wasn't. I know better now, and if I were giving another alcoholic advice on quitting I'd always tell them to get medical help.

Thanks Mags.
Since being in a recovery progam, from Jul, 2016- Jan, 2018 I have a few friends from that program and meetings...but most of these people have relapsed and still have aways to gain a true understanding of what this stuff is all about..they are friends, but I would never rely on them to be there for me.


Enter SR. This place serves me well. Since uses 'in'...I will choose another

Active, enthusiastic participant...

oops- since Sao uses 'in'..

since PJ uses Active, enthusiastic participant...
Present, eager partaker :)

It's friday :)

On this day 27/09 in 1066 a certain William set sail for England.

Have a great day weekenders

Morning gang, yesterday I was reading an article about how alcoholism is one of the only illnesses that people are ashamed to talk about and seesk help for. The woman who wrote the article compared it to HIV/Aids in the 1980's. That would have been a slight exaggeration but the point was well made. It was certainly something I wanted to keep quiet from anyone connected to work even though I would arrive hungover on a daily basis. It underscores Mag's OP about the importance of having people you can A.) speak to honestly and B.) understand what it is to crave booze or to use.

I reckon anyone can use the word "in." I should probably try to be more imaginative.

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Morning Weekenders

I like present, eager partaker and active, enthusiastic participant

and to add to the magnificent words, it’s POETS Day.

Let’s make it a sober friendly weekend. :)

Hi Sober friends and to those that are struggling :wavey:

I will be engaging enthusiastically in a sober weekend. Thanks Mags.

I spend nearly all my time IRL on my own so it is a true life line to be able to come here and share life's ups and downs. And most importantly my sober struggles.

My taper to get sober lasted over 3 years. Something went wrong there somewhere. :lol:

Yesterday I decided it was time to try and knock sugar on the head as I am now completely addicted. And carbs. Never been a dieter before so its all new to me. Slept badly, up and down to the loo as my body rids itself of excess water. Already missing my breakfast of peanut butter on toast. Allowed the peanut butter but not the toast. Jar and spoon comes to mind. :dunno:

Happy Friday. :)

How irritating Marty re the appliances! I have all that to come as my kitchen re-model is about to start in the next couple of weeks. It’s spider mating season in the U.K. and there a loads of them all over my house with it being an old stone house with lots of nooks and crannies. I just let them get on with it but now and again a big one will come scuttling past and I get the shivers. Kitten Max is going great, he’s huge now and starting to wander further from the house when he goes out. I had to get an umbrella and a torch and go looking for him in the pouring rain at 11pm last night.

Here’s to another sober weekend folks!! xx

Where there are spiders...... I tell my family not to kill the spiders, they could be keeping other creepy crawlers at bay. One time, when my dear daughter was young, she awoke in the wee hours to a spider on her pillow staring back. She came flying into our room, and I had to go look for it. Poor thing was probably just as frightened, I told her, and went running back to it's Mommy and Daddy. The idea that there was more of them didn't go over very well.....

The weekends are definitely where I feel the most like an outsider - I don't have any RL sober friends. This time of year, I really enjoying watching some football and the baseball season will soon be moving into the playoffs. Sports and booze is one of, if not the most single, marketing focused aspects of the alcohol industry.

Which makes SR and this thread so great for me!!

Yeah, the sports/booze marketing is insane. I used to spend lots of time at bars "watching games" and drinking. I used the games as a reason to "socialize" and get drunk, and it was completely expected and acceptable where I live. It was just what we all did. What a lot of wasted time! I still watch games. I still love sports. But now, I can watch a football game at noon on a Sunday and still function for the rest of the day! And I remember the whole game. I prefer this way of being a sports fan.

The Newcomers forum is a difficult place, today and every day. Same with Friends and Family.

So much pain caused by alcohol.

Prayers for the still suffering alcoholics and those who love them. May they find peace.

I hope to never suffer in that way again.

Mags thats an awesome OP.

I could not have got through without my SR friends..
Friends are EVERYTHING.
We lift each other up, encourage and understand each other.

Alcoholics are the nicest people when we are not drinking,

Dragon, i woke up with a huntsman spider on my pillow one day staring me straight in the eyes with his 8 eyes.
I did the noble thing and picked him up, took him outside and put him in the neighbours yard :lmao

I never kill them , they eat flys and other bugs, plus if you try to kill them, they go back and tell their families..... :run

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Hi weekenders - I'm in!

Thanks Mags for the thread. Those of us in recovery all need sober friends and I'm hugely grateful to find them here. I'm working on IRL friendships that don't revolve around alcohol but in the meantime SR will do just fine...

Hi Kaily, I'm also going to have to do something about sugar too - it's becoming a bit ridiculous. I had an anxious day yesterday and managed to consume three Danish pastries, binging on sugar much as I used to do with alcohol. Not good.

Bim, prayers indeed. I have just heard that an acquaintance has been given three months to live with advanced cirrhosis which he didn't even know about. Horrible.

Anyway, getting some work done this afternoon so I can have a relaxed weekend (without alcohol OR cake..).. Warm wishes to all as always. Forwards.

Quitting sugar is hard. I am working on it - have cut way way back. I have lost about 8 pounds now, from cutting most sugar and cutting way down on other carbs, too. Yesterday I had some ice cream. It was wonderful. But I woke up all achy this morning - that achiness had almost gone away over the past couple of low-carb months. So it was a good reminder that I am doing a good thing for my body, and I should keep it up.