I tried to quit 2 years ago and went back after 9 months sober. The drinking only got worse and now I'm back again but now I'm being more honest and telling people.

I'm an alcoholic and can't ever drink again.

On Day 14 and sad and scared of who I became because no matter how "high functioning I was" and I run a group of almost 100 people - my liver didn't care and is now damaged. I would like to see my children graduate and would like the opportunity to retire. Do this for you - who cares if you can hide it from others.

Thanks All, for the inspiration ... I'm now running into another temptation, which my intuition tells me many of you are familiar with : " I am not nearly as bad of an alcoloholic as many others"
I've been reading a lot of stories on SR. I have never been to the ER. Never passed out . Never been arrested. Couldn't possibly handle the quantities of drink that others have described.
So does that mean I really didn't have that big of a problem after all ?
I have to say it here - Heck no, it's still a way bigger problem that I thought, and I can never go back, no matter what.

The thing to remember is... us guys who developed into the all day everyday drinkers (like me) were once at this stage too.

It's incredibly wise of you to tackle this now before the problem totally consumes you :)

D

Thanks , and that's what I am terribly afraid of. I know if I don't stop now, my future life expectancy is in the single digits, at best.
My worst fear is I'll kill or hurt someone while driving . Second worst, I'll get pulled over.
The odds can only get worse from here, but I know I can reverse them, if I can get the power to change my lifestlye

Glad you're here posting.

I learned from other to do three things.......

One of the three, I was told - be completely honest with another person in your life.

I took this advice and it helps - mine is a sponsor, but it could be anyone you trust. For me I find value in the age old use of "confession is good for the soul" philosophy.

Keep coming back!

Way to go Belle! :c011:

Flynby - you have hit the nail on head for me... Honesty. I was dishonest with myself, and with others, so I drank to numb my conscience. Now , four days into sobriety, I am reaching for the courage just to be honest. To tell the truth, I don't think I've ever made a proper confession about anything in my life.
Maybe its because we are afraid of disappointing those who we trust, or at least those who have trusted us...

You'll know when the time is right - but it can be a very healthy part of recovery. Choose wisely remembering we can always tell but can't untell

I started simply by telling one person - I think I have a drinking problem and am thinking I should get some help. A door immediately opened.

I also learned not to yell from the roof tops!! :)

Glad you're here friend :)

Bella: Just thought I would extend a friendly "hello"....so hello :)

I have 2 DUI's.
If you asked anyone who knows me, they would have said I am the LAST person they ever would have thought who would be here. I did jail time this last summer for my 2nd one. From the outside, I'm pretty put together. Hell, even my BF said he never would have guessed in a million years that I had this "problem"
you know in your heart, something isn't right - don't let it get to "rock bottom" if you can avoid it.

Hello , Airwick - thanks for the warm welcome

Jupiters - With all my heart, I thank you for sharing that experience - I know I'd get a DUI at some point if I kept going... and that would just break me. I'm already trying to rebuild my life after a huge transition, and a crash or a DUI is the last thing I need. I'm counting on your words to take me through the weekend !

Belle - so glad you are here! I, too, have the those justifications, "Well, I'm not that bad." The things is, I just keep lowering the standard of what I am comparing myself to.

"Well, at least I don't drink and drive." Then, "Well at least I don't drink everyday." Then, "At least I don't drink all day."

The reality is that alcoholism is progressive. My sponsor reminds me anytime I hear someone who has a "lower bottom" than I do, I can think, "That's not me, YET." And he says "YET stands for 'You're Eligible To'".

I'm following a case here where I live. A 30 year old elementary school teacher drove drunk on 12-27-14 and killed a 66 year old woman. That's my sobriety date and that could have easily been me.

We don't have to ride the elevator all the way down. And there is no guarantee that we will make it out alive if we take that gamble.

Glad we are here doing the deal together!