its only been 7 days but i wont miss checking my bank account the next day through my fingers ripping/ ruining clothes (candle wax, wet paint, blood..) checking ive still got my keys and my phone the next day losing one of two shoes waking up next to someone i dont know and wondering how to get home sneaking in to my house at 6/7am (and falling over) walking through town to get home at 6am in broad daylight throwing up dry heaving passing out in public falling over in public sweating alcohol for a straight 2 days afterwards trying to remember what happened being told what happened going to the clinic for a checkup when i was only there the previous month not being able to function for the best part of a week post-binge anxiety/depression oh, regret. i think thats about it? EDIT: unexplained cuts, bruises, burns, concussions |
Avoiding people Working out how not to bump into people you have offended Waking up to find blood everywhere when you have cut yourself Throwing away clothes that you have got blood, alcohol and food stains on Never going away weekends since you spend most of the weekend drinking The terror of running out of alcohol |
Things I don't miss about drinking... Having one foot on the ground and one hand on the wall while laying in bed, in an attempt to ground myself from the spins. Being stuck in bed all day because I was too sick from drinking to even roll over. Crashing on a friends couch with a trash bin two feet away "just in case". Having to explain why I didn't come home the previous night. Lying about why I'm sick and how much I had to drink. "It was just a few, my body just doesn't tolerate alcohol very well." Planning where and when to dump empties, and feeling like the whole world is watching as I'm doing so. Forcing myself to throw up just to feel better the next day. The phone calls and texts I made while drinking. |
- Paying for it - Waking up between 2 and 3 a.m. and not being able to fall back asleep, leaving me a zombie at work the next day - Feeling my clothes get tighter and tighter on me as I let alcohol replace all the good health habits I had, and eating like hell every night - Checking my phone, facebook and email to see what I'd sent the night before and would regret - The "why am I doing this to myself" guilt I'd feel as I'd drag myself out of bed in the morning - Getting in the shower before work, telling myself "I'm not doing this anymore, I am am staying sober tonight" and then deciding before 11 am that I need to get alcohol on the way home - Figuring out what way to drive home from work so I could properly rotate the stores I stop at to buy alcohol, so I wouldn't see the same cashiers on a daily basis |
The hangover, the shakes and the throwing up. I most certainly do not miss that. |
Lying to the kids we have no money for treats when I had money for booze. Getting snappy moody and bitter when drunk. Being too hungover to clean the house or cook a decent meal. Not giving a toss about my personal hygene or what I look like. |
It's so funny how similar and specific the consequences of drinking are for all of us. The morning shame spiral. Trying to pretend you didn't black out. Wondering what embarrassing thing you said to people the night before. Pouring out a bottle in a fit of despair only to buy a new one the next day. The crushing hangovers (for me I would always hit a wall around 3pm--at which point I would start drinking again). Sweating alcohol and smelling like a drunk. Looking in the mirror and seeing a huge fat belly and jowels hanging off my cheeks. Ugh. The list goes on. Here is the other side of the equation: Clarity. Energy. 8 hours of sleep. Weight loss. Productivity. Confidence. Being present. Better skin and hair and body smell. Being open to your world instead of being obsessed with when you can open a bottle. A deeper appreciation for good food. Knowing you can drive anywhere at anytime without worrying about getting a DUI. The moment old friends see you and say "Geez you look great! What happened?!" That's what you get for living in the solution instead of living in the problem. I'm on Day 40 and I'm very thankful. Stay strong you drunks!!! :) |
I'm with you alison and pippo! Ok, and everyone elses's posts. I can also say I don't miss the embarrassing rash of hives I would break out in when drinking. I had forgotten about those until today. |
1. dont miss having to throw away shirts because the armpits were crusty from the constant sweating 2. Don't miss the anxiety it caused me......I would constantly check my eyes to see if they were yellow or inspect the toilet bowl to see if my urine was an odd color. Every pain I had I associated with my heavy drinking |
1 week:) first week celebration: I wont miss waking up and wasting the day laying in bed. The disappointment in my families eyes!!! Not recalling what I have said or done! |
I dont miss the SLEAZY behavior of the drunks I used to call friends or getting out of bed to pee 6 or 7 times a night or worrying if I have enough beer to get through each day It's all over now! |
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