Hi Bool, you seem like an intelligent person that is struggling with your alcohol (even if just on the weekends...). What you are doing is know as "Binge Drinking" and it is just as bad for your body & brain as someone who drinks everyday. Please dont think that just because you only do it 2 days a week that it is not harmful, it is.

Here is a great article that may help you to understand some of the things you are going through.

http://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publicatio...22-1/25-34.pdf

As related to this part of your post:

Yeah...That could be it.....I got tired just reading this thread. There has to be a better way. I hope you find it.

Found some worksheets that you might like too:

Check your drinking pattern to see if you have signs of a problem: Interactive worksheets & more - Rethinking Drinking - NIAAA

I also agree that definitions are vague and not helpful really. I don't think it is about how much someone drinks or on what days. For me it is about how I react when I drink alcohol. When I have that first drink I can't stop and continue to drink. I just don't stop. That is why I know I have a problem. Not even mentioning the dreadful things I have done over the years.

If someone has to think so much about drinking/not drinking/what time to drink/how much to drink/how much not to drink/hiding drink so it won't be drunk/how to control drinking/ controlling days when to drink/not to drink-it all sounds terribly complicated and time consuming and is a sign of a problem.

'Normal' drinkers don't think about drinking, never mind put so much time and effort into thinking about it. I also agree that people who sign up to SR, know in some way that they have a problem.

good luck and I hope you get the help and support you need

I can't predict your case, but I wish I'd taken more notice when I started binge drinking regularly and blacking out.

What you are doing falls under the category of binge drinking, by the definition. Binge drinking, never mind alcoholism, has its own risks and health issues.

I asked myself this question a lot in my early days of recovery, what kind of drinker am I? Even the professionals couldn't seem to agree on it. Some considered me a binge drinker with signs of dependency, some an alcoholic. It mattered less and less to me as I progressed in recovery. I just know I was drinking at high risk levels and had a mental obsession with alcohol that wasn't healthy.

I guess I consider myself an alcoholic, in that all attempts to moderate have failed or not succeeded long. But many people associate that word with a lot of images of end stage alcoholism only. So I have mixed feelings about the label 'alcoholic', I guess it's the way you use the term in recovery that counts.

I'd be cautious and maybe think about a period of abstinence, to clear your thoughts and consider the role of alcohol in your life - a break for your mind and body. Many 'moderation' programs recommend this - an initial period of abstinence, one to two months. Of course if you are an alcoholic though you won't be able to maintain moderation when you reintroduce, and/or the psychological signs and symptoms will return. This isn't really a moderation site, but there are some out there with suggestions if that is your goal.

For me, the goal had to be abstinence and though I wasn't thrilled to begin with, I'm quite happy to stay that way nowadays.

thanks so much for posting this part.

i should have thought twice before posting anything here, because it's more or less an abstinence site as opposed to a moderation site. My fault.

I noticed that anything I post regarding my own moderation seems to be met with "it's alcoholism, or complete abstinence - one or the other". I can appreciate that, and thank you.

For the time being, I'm more interested in moderating/limiting my alcohol intake, because at this stage of my life, I'm able to do so without slipping into 'oblivion' as we say. I can stop after a set amount, so long as I actually 'set' my amount. I still have that timer in my head that says ok, my limit is reached- no more tonight. Don't know what my future holds, I can appreciate that I may always keep a control on it, or maybe I won't. If I find myself exceeding my personal allowance, then I need to come back. Thanks again to everyone, but I'm in the wrong place, and don't want to aggravate anyone any further.

Not aggravation at all. I hope it works out for you. Try to be honest with yourself if it doesn't. Good luck, Bool.

Bool, We are all sorry if you found us to be just advocating for complete absenteeism. It was not for you to get discouraged from becoming moderate drinker but it was from our own learning experience ( learned very hard way ). If you are able to enjoy your moderate drinking and control it to " Set limits " , please enjoy and have good times. We wish you all the best and any time in future, you need any support , SR will always be there to support you whether we individuals are there or not.