Step out of the closet! The GLBT newbie thread
 

:bundance
So what's up with the gay/lesbian/bi/transexual community in SR??! Closets are annoying and claustrophobic,so I just use mine to hang clothes and hide the occasional skeleton.

Some feel that we need a separate subforum, but I agree with the mods: why segregate ourselves? True, most of us have alternative issues to deal with but then again, who doesn't?! I say, dump the "us and them".

So if you consider yourself part of the G/L/B/T population, or if you are straight as an arrow, confused, curious, or just enjoy the camp factor... chip in! It's all in good fun. :147:

I guess I'll kick off, I've always been gay and never thought of it as being a problem. Discovering that a lot of people did have a problem with that, however, baffled me. I struggled when I came out to my family when I turned 20. I think that being gay only played a small part in my alcoholism, mainly related to loneliness and isolation. But, if I were straight, I'm pretty sure I would have felt lonely and isolated anyway. Though I guess I did feel a bit guilty for a while because my parents weren't exactly thrilled. I eventually learned that was their own problem to deal with, and they've gradually accepted me for who I am. EIGHT years later, my mother is now prodding me to find a "nice boy" to be with - who would have thunk!

I gradually figured out how to be myself AND fit in at the same time without ruffling too many feathers. I want tolerance, so I learned to be tolerant. Don't get me wrong though, I'm tough and won't take any BS ;) But I think we all have challenges to deal with. Coming out, though scary, was more than worth it. Girls feel safe around me and spoil me to death, a lot of guys feel more comfortable talking about their more mushy feelings with me... And I love that. Gay and proud of it? Naaah, not really. Just proud of being true to myself.

:dance:

I wish I was gay then I could tell a woman I like her bathing suit and truly mean her bathing suit.

:wink3:

great idea Matt :)

D

for me orientation really doesnt matter unless there are unwanted advances - Im straight !!
but I suppose the same would go for the entire community

Not gay, not straight, not sure what I am LOL. Does it really matter?

I'm married to a wonderful man but I have dated women in my past. Does that make me bi? I don't know. I have no desire to be with anyone but my husband at this point in life.

Yeah, point well taken!! Thanks :) Labels can be empty and pointless, it's being yourself that counts.

cracks me up!

Until recently I would have considered myself ?asexual? I just seemed to be one of those people for whom sex just doesn't matter...virtually no sex drive...talk about a way to not fit in!!!!! Why I was that way doesn't matter really..it was who i was. And I had to learn to be ok with that.

Right now I am sexually attracted to a man...but I assume that i am likely to return to the asexual mode.

I don't really care what "orientation" (is that the word?) people are...as long as they don't sexually threaten me.

And I love to flirt...and I found out here at SR that without a person to look at, I can't tell if someone is male or female :) Just goes to show we are all more alike than different!

mattcake -- I hope I didn't put you off! Labels just don't matter to me, but I know that sometimes its nice to identify with people like myself! Kinda like we have the women's group, men's group, etc.

I think its a great idea to bond with fellow GLBT people! I, personally love all my straight and gay ppl equally -- I just never look at the label!

LOL, not at all!! You got me thinking about stuff... Labels, identity, black and white thinking.. Those are big issues for me. I thought it would be a good idea to start this thread because, among other reasons, I'm looking forward to learning from other people's points of view. So I really appreciated your comments, thanks :) Also, I really wanted to encourage GLBT newbies (or oldies) that might be struggling with that aspect of themselves to discuss it openly.

sure thing! i think its a great idea!

I am not gay but I feel that as an addict there are things that we all need to come out of the closet about.

I'm straight.

I think being honest & open about one's sexuality is good for sponsorship purposes. I don't feel it is appropriate to sponsor someone if there could be a sexual attraction.

Just my opinion.

Great thread Matt :)

For me personally sexuality isnt black and white and there are many types other than gay or straight. Im not sure really where i fall in. For the last few years I've been in the asexual group, ive never had much of a sex drive and im on meds that further surpress it, but its all good. Plus dating would have taken up valuable drinking time. Im looking forward to the idea that i may recover enough to get back into the dating scene.

I've never seen anything wrong with people loving other people no matter what!

Heavy

so far I'm straight...:)
but for me love is love...
Matt, I love this thread, thanks!

I personally think this is a great idea too. I have run into a few members here in the past. That were scared to come clean with their sexuality here.
Only because of the same fear that they feel in everyday life struggling with this issue.
And when your trying to deal with an addiction on top of it. It gets scary and confusing.
Especially if some of a person's story involves this detail.
I dont like labels either. But its a reality.
And not knowing how others will take you if exposed. Can be scary.
I have never seen any kind of segregation..racism or hate here before. Nothing but love here.
But just as it is hard for some members..especially the newcomer to be open with their addiction. It can be hard to be open with all things.
So yes..Matty... Wonderful idea!!
This will show and prove to anyone here already and newcomers.
That it is not an issue. We dont judge here. And we accept everyone.
I myself am bi...Can be controversial. In a sense..I have been told I am just confused because of this. But whatever. It is what it is.
Doesnt bother me and never really has.

Jigoflife...That cracked me up.

Thank you Matty! I know this will help some people feel more comfortable.

Down with the boundries!! I accept each and every one of you for trying to be a better "Cleaner" person with me no matter what your orientation is. All for one and one for all!

Heavy