Thats a darn good rating WL.
Good job.

That’s really good WL! Well done! :)

Thank you all for your support. I made it through the day. The stress combined with the hangover made me literally sick all day. I didn't even change out of my pajamas. I was in bed all day. Hubby took care of me. I was finally able to eat soup tonight. I can't do this again. I can't deal with this horrible aftermath.

Willow I will try and play it forward in my head the next time the AV hits me. Congrats to you for being so strong and kicking that AV to the curb. I'm so proud of you!

Dee, congrats on 15 years! You are an inspiration. I love hearing about that because it reminds me it is possible.

WL - so glad to hear you got your credit up. I am disgusted because 12 years ago, I had horrible credit and then no credit and then I built it up and was in the 700's at one point. That's when I slowly over the years got in a mountain of credit card debt that I will never get out from. I terrified about the process and how much of my stuff I will have to surrender. But more than all that, I can buy stuff again. I just need to be out from under this mountain of debt that is killing me.

I watched the latest episode of Dexter last night. I remember it was good but I was drunk so I need to watch it again when I feel better. I'm also currently watching Yellowstone and love it. Is anyone watching?

TC- I know you can do it. You still have the fight in you. I for one am pulling for you and hard. Don't give up. Let's all stay sober.

Take care everyone and have a sober happy peaceful night.
Hope

You could not keep me away from Dexter New Blood unless you chained me up somewhere....I have been waiting and waiting and waiting. And I am not disappointed. :) No spoilers though.

:grouphug:

Well done Hope on making it though day one. That’s a really good achievement! Day ones totally suck, I really feel for you :hug: I’ve had way too many of my own day ones. But this can be your last day one. Day 2 will be a little easier. Sending you a big hug of support ❤️

I'm making it through day two. I've just have this awful anxiety and stress in my chest that won't go away. I know everything is ok with my heart because I was just in to see the cardiologist in late August. Had all kinds of tests run. This is pure anxiety over my finances and if my bankruptcy will be approved or if creditors will be able to sue me and take everything I have. It makes me go to a very dark place in my head when I think about it.
I can't turn off my head from thinking and that's one of the reasons I would drink. I simply terrified of the process and how we will end up when it's over. If it's over. I can't even go out and get an extra job. I have so much anxiety and panic attacks. I do some work from home with my husband but it's not enough to cover all our credit card debts and personal loan debts. I'm just rambling I know. I'm just super anxious right now and thought I would come here. I can't stop crying.
But thankfully I'm almost finished with day two. BTW, I do have anxiety medication I am prescribed. I'm not sure how much it helps. I was almost off of it at one point last year. Now, I am taking the full dose and still feeling no relief.

Thanks for listening everyone. Have a sober happy night. Sorry to be a downer today.
Hope

Venus- I'm so happy to have another Dexter fan in the house! I've waited and hoped for years too. I have watched all the old seasons at least four times each. I know that's crazy. I used to watch it to fall asleep. lol I also listen to crime podcasts to fall asleep so I'm weird I know.

I often think of Karen as well. When I logged back on for the first time a week or so ago, I had a private message from her but it was from a few months ago. I hope she is doing well. We need her here!

My best advice is talk to a financial counsellor before you do this....there are hardship payments that can be set up and a number of other things....you may have already done this. :hug: s

If you do need to file bankruptcy, again, talk to more than one expert.
It can be handled well, as others have mentioned.

Just sending love and support and understanding.
I had a lot of mess I had to fix. :hug: s xx

Hope, I was starting to get calls from my CC companies when I could no longer cover the minimum payments because the interest was just piling more and more on. I drank to cope with the stress. Drank so bad I had to check into rehab for 5 weeks after which I was clear-minded enough to deal with my financial problems. Financial worries are probably a reason a lot of people drink.

Day 6. I assume no change in my father's status since my brother is not returning my calls. Before this crisis, we haven't spoken in 10 years. He never even left home and has been living with our parents his whole life. He's 47 now and never even had a job. His reasoning was he was taking care of my elderly parents. Well, mom drank herself to death 3 years ago, now Das has drank himself to death. He's done a great job looking after them! Haha

I will text her again tomorrow. xx

It isn't crazy to me.....the music alone in this show is enough to entrance me. :) ❤️

WL- Congrats on 6 days. One more day and you'll have a week. I'm envious. I need my body to feel back together to deal with the stress in my mind. I need to constantly remind myself that drinking will not make this better. When I got so anxious today that I thought I would explode, I had a thought of a bottle of wine. I had to remind myself what you all say- that it will not make it better. It will make it worse.

TC- how are you today?
Willow- hoping you are still kicking that AV out of your life and enjoying the fact that you are six months sober. I just think of it and think about having been there and how good it feels and how much easier each day is to navigate and deal with the crap that comes our way.

I love Dexter too. Just haven’t watched it in ages as we don’t currently have pay TV or Netflix.

Well done on day 2 Hope, you’re doing great!
And yes, wine only makes the anxiety worse tomorrow. I can honestly say, my anxiety is getting less. I used to feel sick to the stomach from anxiety, and drink to take it away. But it was only temporary relief at best, and the rebound anxiety the next day was awful! Way worse! It really does get easier with more sober time :hug:

You too WL! Great work on day 6.

I hope you’re hanging in there TC.

And it would be really great to hear from you too Karen. If you’re having a tough time, come say hi.

How’re you doing nmd? What’s happening in your part of the world?

Sending you all lots of support :grouphug:

It hasn't been on for 10 years Willow, so you didn't miss anything :)
It is on Showtime. You can subscribe to Paramount Plus there if you want to see the new season (I looked up how to watch in Aus) ....it is two episodes in.

Things will start looking much better in the next few days.Hope. Stay sober through this.
I find that alcohol is so destructive on our emotional well being. The fear, shame, remorse etc, are just so exasperated by the drink.
I can empathize about the anxiety. On day two and three I chew aspirin fearing a heart attack.

Bankruptcy exists because it is needed. A gazillion people have done this. I’m sure it is designed to be doable, It’ll likely turn out much better than imagined.

So glad you’re here with us again. Hang in there Hope. :grouphug: (hugs)

I feel better now. My emotions take a SERIOUS dive when affected by alcohol. I’m hoping that I can start using past tense.
I hate, hate, hate, hate my alcoholism.

Sober: good. Drunk:bad.

Have a good thing folks!

Makes my heart so happy to hear that you are doing a bit better dear TC :hug: ❤️

Thank you TC. It does my heart good to hear that you are better. And you make me feel better with the bankruptcy comments. Take care of yourself.
Hope

Me too, it’s so good to hear you sounding more positive TC :hug:
You too Hope :hug: There IS a way out for you. It will work ok somehow. As Dee says, everything will be ok in the end, and if it’s not ok, it’s not the end.

Alcohol really messes with our self esteem and mental health. I’m 100% sure it is a huge contributor to depression and anxiety for me. It gets me feeling so low and so anxious that I think everything is futile, and the only option is to drink. It’s a liar and a cheat. It actually creates all that negativity, then wants us to continue to feed it. It’s an insatiable monster that sucks us down and tries to drown us.

So we’re much better off not feeding it at all. Then it will wither away and our mood magically improves. Only it’s not magic, it’s just our real self being allowed to surface again, instead of being drowned in alcohol and whipped into submission by the AV monster.

When we stop drinking, we let our real selves up for air, and we can begin to swim again, and we can swim our way out of the awful quagmire that the AV tries to trap us in.

thanks Suze. I didn’t realise it had been that long! :)