Very interesting D, my feelings towards weed are the same actually, I thought it was part of my identity almost. I think I'm still holding on by a thread with it maybe, I smoked like that too...now not so much tho but I still do and probably Shouldent, it probably adds to my issues I'm having

Rock, I'm glad you survived and you seem to have an amazing outlook on it all once you can subtract the extreme anxiety from it...I commend your positivity despite times of mental peril

I smoked it for 30 years ST - it definitely unhinged me a little.

It was a long journey back to feeling what I see as a healthy mental place for me.
It feels good to be 're-hinged' :)

D

Solitary, it couldn't hurt to give it a go! Like I said, I used it as an anxiety remedy for close to 15 years...after being without it even after only a couple weeks, my anxiety started to dramatically decrease. Dee and many others here have suggested that the weed itself is very likely the root of the anxiety we face, and I have to say I believe that it's true in my case. Plus, I know what you mean about testing limiting job opportunities...for the first time since I was probably 17, I'm finally confident that I can pass a drug test! I can't tell you how many opportunities I've passed up in the past due to the fact that I know I would drop a dirty drug test. Give it a whirl! Best wishes xoxo

I agree on the weed front Dee! Before alcohol, I spent a long few years on weed. And I thought that I was medicating the anxiety and had diagnosed myself with horrible acid reflux on days when I wasn't smoking. Turns out weed was making me anxious and screwing with my natural hunger. When I would run out and start combing through the carpet with a pair of tweezers so my stomach ache would go away. I would like to say that I stopped cause I wanted to, but it started giving me such bad panic attacks after a bad trip that it stopped being relaxing.

And thanks ST. It's been a rollercoaster of a day. I'm honestly not feeling great about how things are right now today. I mean I don't want to give up this class. But it felt good to face something that I was really anxious about instead of running away from it. It sucked, but it was good to know that I CAN do things. Sometimes everything feels impossible. Sorry you're having such a rough one ST. Sending whatever good vibes I've managed to come out of today with your way!

Thank you, Dee, I appreciate you sharing your experience with me. It's a little different where I live than in most places. It's still technically illegal here, unless you have a medical card, which I do not, but it's still used openly everywhere, with little fear of consequences. I haven't even paid for it in years, but the supply has been unending. As for the people using it, even a lot of our public officials do, it's that much a part of my city.
Having said all that, I'm done with it, after about 35 years of regular use. I am committed to that, I just can't stand that I still crave it, I trust myself to abstain, though. I can't avoid seeing it, I smelled it in the parking lot of the grocery store today, there are anti prohibition billboards up on the roads here, and it will very likely be legal in this state after the next general election, I just want to stop wanting it.
I'm glad you told me that it took you a really long time to get to that point, I needed an idea of what to expect. It surprises me that I was able to let go of opiates more easily than herb. I never would have expected that.

Rockstonic, you made it through today, hard as it was, and you survived it. Now you know you can face the next hard day, too. This is a learning process, and you are making progress every day.

That's the outlaw anarchist in you Adna,

As soon as it's legal , ...bye bye, ...."I'm off this train"

just kidding ( sort of )

ST, ......I hope you'll give it a try . I quit smoking herb the same day I quit drinking, along with nixing any sugar. For me , it's like a circuit breaker. If I start to crave an innocent doughnut, big deal. It sends my antenna up as to why that is ?

And I need all the circuit breakers I can get , probably.

The same with the herb. I have a longer history with it, than with booze.
Although I can't possibly compare the effects of herb to alcohol. Booze sent me to a dark, dark place, ...and eventually all most did me in , I think.

I can't honestly say that about sugar, or weed, ...but weed is definitely something I don't need in my life , ...for many reasons. Traveling being just one.

Also , I love the concept of being completely free, ...to live a simple life (all the time) , ...if that makes sense.

I'm seriously going to try, from what it sounds like everyone is describing here, it really could be the "thing" that has been causing all this extra strife in my situation....

I always thought it was calming me down and helping me eat but I could absolutely be wrong

no problem :)

The irony of this is not lost on me.

I finally got my codependency no more book, I probably ordered it a month ago lol, I think I'm gonna lay down watch something on my iPad and read a chapter our two...May check back here before bed but if not then till tomorrow April fools, lol even I'm saying it now :)

Night/day to whoever is left.

Night all! See you in four hours for some cramming! :whoop

Rocks ,

you're a trooper !!

new part here:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...part-10-a.html

D