Grace, you crack me up! I love your sense of humor. :rotfxko

Steve, you must have a tremendous metabolic rate. I can only imagine how many calories you burn off with your runs, walks, and workouts. If you could bottle the secret, I'd buy all you have!

Veggie and Grace--sleep well, tonight. Zzzzzz......

Erica, Mom is doing well, thank you so much for asking. :)

WTH--good luck with that deadline and pressure. Even if the AV whispers in your ear, I know you'll be able to resist.

Speaking of the AV--today I indulged in a hobby I just love. In the past, I would always associate this activity with drinking afterward. Today, it just didn't come to mind. Not saying I'm immune or bragging or anything. Just grateful that I didn't have to fight a battle today. That's my wish and hope for you all tonight and tomorrow. It's so much easier to stay strong when we stand together, eh?

It is so quiet here! I miss you guys! Hope all is well with everyone!

I burned the midnight oil last night and worked until 1:30AM - likely the same scenario tonight. In my former life - it would have been fueled with beer and wine - now, just sparkling water. Once I get past 7PM, the alcoholic voice fall silent.

It is the close of day 21 today -- three weeks! I am very proud of myself. I have never made it past three days before -- so, this is a fairly big deal.

Take care all - Panacea

Congratulations panacea :)

D

Panacea, forget 3 weeks being a "fairly big deal." It's a total big deal. You are awesome!!!! Keep it up.

Nuway, what is the hobby you love? I'm curious.

So, I made a phone call today to another AA member. Fortunately the call went to voicemail. I left a message and then the girl and I played phone tag and ended up texting back and forth. I called my sponsor tonight and told her. She was happy to hear it and told me to call someone else tomorrow. Ugh. Oh well, maybe it'll be easier tomorrow. I'm going to go and hit some golf balls tomorrow. I'm pretty excited. It has been years since I've golfed. I am not any good but it's fun.

Day 34 just starting here...Already been out with the dog and now I'm slurping my pint of tea and getting the kids ready for school...Many congrats on 3 weeks panacea,keep it going...I'll check back in later when I have more time...Take care.....Steve...

Panacea - well done on three weeks - brilliant!

Nuway - I'm also curious of the hobby! Thanks for sharing, I'm sure some of us are putting off things we used to associate with drinking but at some point at least some of them will have to be faced.

Erica - enjoy the golf, never tried it unless you count crazy golf when I was about 8 - sounds fun!

x

It doesn't matter it is Friday night....the last day of work for 2 weeks...I'm going to a sports presentation night...dressed up as a priest...I do not need a drink...yikes I just saw my husbands outfit !!!!!!!!!!!!!!:react

Morning everybody

And another miserable, dark, grey, wet one it is here in the U.K. I'm not in work today, but I've got the 3 cherub-pests, so nursery runs, school run etc, etc. The little one is not in nursery today, but the middle one is in this morning, so when I pick her up at lunch time I think I may take them to a soft play area for an hour or so whilst the weather is so gloomy.

It's lovely not waking up to the alarm clock on my days off, I always wake up early anyway but its just nice to do it naturally. I slept well too last night by the way. I've been very productive this morning too, I've got a casserole on the go for dinner, a pasta bake for the children. The oldest one will only eat pasta bake and garlic bread on a Friday, won't entertain anything else. lol. He's very set in his ways, bless him. I've also made them some multi coloured jellies.
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Hi Nuway, glad to hear your mum is doing okay. Anyway, you've got us all intrigued now, so come share what this mysterious hobby is that you love so much!
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Panacea, Well done you on 21 days, totally amazing, we knew you could do it. :grouphug: Makes sure you get some rest too after working so late into the night, don't get yourself run down.

Erica, well at least you tried with the other A.A member, I think that's really good. Pat on the back for you. Enjoy your day golfing, I've never played it myself but I should imagine it's quite good fun.

Morning Steve, It could be a competition here on who drinks the most tea, me or you, I'm on my 2nd now! Have a good day. What did you think of the new gym you went to check out?

Jo, hope you're feeling better today and your headache has lifted. Hope you had a better sleep too, it makes all the difference.

LSC1- A Priest! Ha ha, you'r going to get people confessing all there sins to you. lol. Well come on and share, what is your husband wearing??
It was really funny reading that it is Friday night where you are and you're getting ready to go out. It's 08.30 Friday morning here and I haven't even got dressed yet!
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Oh well, better go and get my shower and another cup of tea. Here's wishing you all a good, safe, sober day. Stay strong, we're all in this together and together we will do it!

Big hugs

Gxx

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Just for today I will be happy. Most people are as happy as they make up their minds to be.

I stated this class and did not make it, but I am on day 5 in September. I hope you are all well. God Bless.

That's brilliant news wwg, :You_Rock_ I posted in your class earlier. Keep it up now over the week end. Keep yourself busy, you can do it, If I can, you can!

Gxx

Home after the presentation night....apple juice followed by tomato juice and a pot of chamomile tea :) . I have my proficiency swim 2moz 8 laps in 9 mins :gaah early night....40 days / nights dry tonight :)

Grace my husband went as a Pauper...we had to go dressed as something starting with the letter "P"

LSC1 glad you had a good night. You've still not told us what your husband wore!! Good luck with your swim tomorrow. Night night.XXX ( we've just had lunch!)

Gxx

A priest and a pauper. Too funny!

Good luck with your swim. I enjoy swimming. In fact I was planning on hitting the pool for lap swim today but my kids have a half day of school. I had no idea! So, I'll go to the driving range and hit some golf balls and then go to the grocery store. Such fun, right?

Hello everyone,

Sweetie's birthday - she is 17- came off wonderfully. I baked her cake and for the first time ever made drizzle icing to do the writing, made it from sugar, butter, milk and vanilla, it is totally teeth rottingly awesome and I was so psyched that I did it myself. I even added butter to the canned chocolate frosting lol and it improved the consistency quite a bit. I really enjoy cooking but got into the habit over the years with working 50 hrs a week of doing everything the fast/unhealthier way so it's good to start flexing my kitchen skills. Anyway oh yeah then I made homemade home fries for the first time ever, so easy to make and the ex loved them. I have decided my new hobby is creative cooking and baking which as a kid I loved doing and lost that somewhere along the line.

Ramble ramble. So yeah we had the cake and she loved her gifts, her dad got her this big-*ss boom box that plays mp3's as well as discs and cassettes.
He downloaded the Wiggles tunes for her and a bunch of other stuff on there too like Beatles and all sorts of rock.
She liked all her gifts and we went to dinner then after picking up the B. We had filet mignon and ate like royalty , it was really fun and enjoyable.

I did make the call today to the hha agency. For starters, she changed her own schedule while I was well into my beers and has been coming over M-T-W where it was supposed to be M-W-F but she just rearranged it to suit herself so she can get 40 hours a week between us and her other client.
Because she overlooked my drinking I let it go. She saw me so sick with hangover and one time I was passed out the whole time she was here and wasn't sure what day it was when I woke. And she never said a word about it. I was a mess. That's the problem with having something to hide. Then people can get away with stuff too and you enter into a mutual agreement of "i won't tell if you don't".
So without going into a litany of things I have noticed in sobriety that upset me, my point is that I called the agency this morning and simply told them that I have a scheduling conflict, our needs have changed, and I want someone Monday and Friday, as I am cutting back and taking more on myself since our situation has improved, and that M-T-W is redundant at this point.

Annnd got my car fixed yesterday. :) Which, I originally thought would solve my issues with the hha. But then I went out on Wed. to a meeting and she said if the house burns down from a fire from next door she will do her best to get all of the ex's music stuff, and my computer, out of the house. So that pretty much ended that fantasy and I made the call. My problem is I'm thinking with emotions and it's hard to detach because in a way I want her to have her 40 hours but self preservation and desire for peace of mind prevailed and I made the call.

Meeting tonight , it's a woman speaking who has 8 years so there will be cake!

My entire body is sore. I have been doing the walks for 8 days and even my upper arms are sore. How weird. Good weird, though! Like the body waking up saying, "heyyyy! why aren't you sitting around like a slug?!?!"

I need to read back on how everyone else is doing, hope you are all doing well! I just wanted to get this out about Sweetie's birthday and hha while it's fresh in my mind.

:thanks

Day 49 and still making progress.

I'm going to have to start posting here on a more regular basis to help keep our class active. Things have definitely slowed down over the past ten days.

It's ironic, because we were a very active group. Maybe I jinxed it? On 9/11, I put together a list of the August class active as of that date. Our group was 28 strong. Since then, we've dropped down to 14 regularly posting to this this thread. A few class members have joined the September group, another handful are still active on SR (logging in, but not posting) and a couple have not logged in for quite some time.

So for those in the last two categories, we'd love to hear from you!

I feel like I am in a blender right now, testing different recipes made up of physical, mental and emotional ingredients. The mix is different each day, so the dish never comes out quite the same. That's one of the reasons I have not been posting...everything seems to be in so much flux right now.

I have an appointment with my PCP on Monday to discuss how we proceed from here. There is definite clinical and test results to support something organic is going on with my health and one important question I want to ask is if there is any medication I can begin taking now to slow the progression of symptoms while I navigate medical appointments and further testing.

Ebshot...over time, it should get easier and easier to make those phone calls, especially when you find you get a benefit from them. You deserve an "atta boy" for stepping outside of your comfort zone and making them.

Stevie...can't believe how you can pack away the calories. Then again, some of your workouts are pretty intense, so you must be burning a fair amount of calories. I've been struggling to gain weight, so this week I started eating ice cream and have managed to put on a few pound. I have to buy more today while it is still on sale.

Stairs...if you don't mind my asking, what is the hha agency for?

JoJo...when will you hear about the job interview? I was often surprised at the results, doing much better than I expected.

Pippo...congrats on your thirty days!

Grace...I think about you and your relationship all of the time, yet don't feel qualified to give any advice. My gut tells me you have a good handle on things and are sensitive to needs and opportunities to improve things. The silent treatment is indeed very hard.

Misery loves company, so I guess that's why many of us are dealing with sleep issues. The "change" definitely had an effect on my sleep so that I had no true pattern, but what is happening now is ridiculous! I swear that I did not get a wink of sleep on Tuesday night.

I have been hearing that pesky AV quite a bit lately. Now I know this might sound crazy to some, but one of the things that has been bringing it on lately is when I have a really bad day with the vision/balance problems where things feel so off that a drink would calm them down and stop muscle spasms. Or Wednesday, when I was experiencing derealization.

The good thing is that there is no booze in the house and it is easy to let the time pass so that the unwanted thoughts fade into nothingness.

Hugs to all, and keep posting. I will try to do better.

Hi all,

28 days for me - assuming I don't throw it all out of the window in the next 5 hrs!

Slim really god to hear from you, I find out next week - I will be staggered if I get the job, I certainly know if I was on the other side of the table I wouldn't be hiring me - who's knows - they seemed to like me but I tripped up over a couple of the more technical questions so I guess it depends whether they want to take a punt on me! Sorry things are still in flux for you, but hopefully with the medical attention your heading the right way. It doesn't sound crazy that your AV is trying to get a drink out of the situation but we all know it won't help - keep saying no, you deserve better, x

Stairs, how yummy does that cake sound! I don't bake often enough (this is usually because my kitchen isn't actually clean enough and/or clear of clutter) but its definitely good for the soul. I was going to buy my mother in law a birthday cake for Sunday but maybe you've inspired me! Glad Sweetie enjoyed her birthday but you might be regretting that boom box!

LSC - a priest and an pauper - ohh err missses!! It sounds like you have a great time

Grace hope you've enjoyed the day with the kiddie winks and they've not worn you out too much - your kids are lucky to have you on hand for so much childminding - I hope they appreciate it, x

Hello to everyone else,

x

Day 34 nearly over as I'm gonna be hardcore rock n roll and go and watch TV in bed soon...Lol...Had a good day today and feel pretty good....Ate lots again(whats new)drank plenty of water and also drank a fair bit of pomegranate juice...slimslim I have also been eating lots of ice cream so I'm hoping I've put a bit of weight back on when I weigh myself Sunday....Veggiejojo 30 days will be here soon,you are doing great keep it up...After the weekend I have decided that I'm gonna try and cut out the junk food and cut down on my tea intake...I'm gonna replace the junk with proper high protein high carb foods such as Tuna,Pilchards,Mackeral,Pasta,Rice and Potatoes...Also I'm gonna replace some of the tea and water that I drink with Full fat milk...The reason for this is that I'm really gonna up my food consumption and my training in order to try and pack on some quality muscle now....So that's my plan...Gonna be a slob for the weekend and just chill out,then come Monday,strict diet and hardcore training here we come....Hope everyone has a great weekend...Take care....Steve...

Howdy, everyone! I'm at 32 days!!!

I had a VERY strange dream last night that involved a relapse on my part. :c004: I actually think the seed was planted in my brain when I was at the grocery store yesterday afternoon and walked by a wine display and thought, "Boy, a bottle of crisp white wine would REALLY go great with dinner tonight!" Thank God that thought was fleeting and I kept on walking.

Fast forward to later in the night while I was in REM sleep...I dreamt that an unknown friend and I were walking around the grounds of our local airport in the middle of the night. With me, I had a small green suitcase (from my childhood) full of booze. We got caught by the police and taken to juvenile detention, which is HILARIOUS since I am 40 years old and I never got into trouble as a teen.

Anywho, I remember being put in some sort of halfway house with plaid upholstered easy chairs and musty grandma couches. They left me there with my suitcase full of liquor (guess they didn't bother to look inside of it). So I thought, "What the hell, I'm already in trouble so who cares if I drink and throw away my days of sobriety?" And, with that, I opened up the suitcase, grabbed a bottle of Everclear (190 proof, yo!) and proceeded to guzzle THE.ENTIRE.THING!!! Then I had the issue of having to hide the bottle so into the bathroom I go and stash the empty in the cupboard under the sink.

This morning when I woke up my first thought was I was going to have to come on to SF and confess what I had done. Gawd, how I hated the thought of that!!! Then it occurred to me that it was only a dream. All I gotta say is halle-f'n-lujah!!!

P.S. I love reading all your stories. It truly keeps me sane, honest to goodness. So, I thank you all for that.

Hello, everyone! Got a late start today on posting, but I did have a quick read of the thread this morning.

Pan, a belated big congrats on day 21! And now 22. Way to go.

Hi, LCS1. I can only imagine your hubby's costume--I bet you made a funny pair.

Slim, good to hear from you, as always. I do feel for you in your state of not knowing about your physical health. I hope you can get some answers and a specific treatment plan very soon. Here's a good and positive thought that you will start sleeping better.

And you haven't jinxed our class. I was an early lurker, too, but I decided the effort put forth in becoming a true regular here would pay back many times over. And it has. There is "generic" support and then there's the specific support of folks who know what's going on with us. I find the latter so much more helpful, and it's a pleasure to be part of this group with a common goal.

Erica, sorry you had to sub grocery shopping for swimming. :( That's not a fair exchange--I hope you get to make up that swim soon.

Stairs--sounds like you had a lovely birthday celebration for Sweetie. Happy to hear you're rediscovering your love of cooking/baking. If you keep making proper choices like butter and more butter, you will have great sucess! LOL ;) Congrats on being more active and on getting your car back.

Veggie, my money is on you--I'm sure you will sail through those 5 hours and reach 29 days.

Steve--sounds like a good approach to your muscle building goal. Whole milk will definitely give you more calories, and nutrients, than tea. Gotta hand it to you: what you were doing wasn't working for you, and you have the courage to make changes. Good on you. Enjoy kicking back this weekend.

Aw, Pip--what a scary dream. But that's all it was. You don't have to take any ownership of what your subconscious cooked up for you last night. Take heart--you had a fleeting thought of wine in the store, and you triumphed over it. Now that's real!

WWG-- you are always welcome with our class, too. Thanks for keeping us updated. May God bless you, too. ((hug))

Grace, we seem to have started the same kind of "day off"--one with as many responsibilities as we would have had if we were working. I must say, though, that you have me trumped completely, because taking care of kiddos is harder than anything I ever have to do. Veggiejojo is right: they (and your kids) are very fortunate to have a loving and caring grandmom close by. Sorry you've had so much gloomy weather. I wish we could see a little more of those damp and gray skies here!

WTH--hope you're doing well. We look forward to hearing from you when you have a chance. :)

So, here's my hobby: I love to target shoot with pistols and rifles. A little unusual for a middle-aged woman. :tongue: It's great fun to try to put holes in paper very close together from a long distance. Paper is all I care to shoot--I'm not into hunting or varminting. I just like the test of precision. I think it was Erica who said she was a "task nerd". That describes me to a T as well. :)

I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend. I'll be working the next three days, so I'll post as I can. But I'll be thinking of each one of you!

Thanks for your concern. And you're right, it was only a dream. Hooray! BTW, I love your hobby. I'm a fan of target shooting, as well. Hmmm...something else for me to get back into.