You reap what you sow/Act as if?!
 

Does anyone believe that if they begin to THINK they are wonderful, deserving- all that good stuff- that they will eventually develop these qualities?? I don't even mean BELIEVE, I guess I mean to ask if anyone has had experience with this ??

I realize the idea that we are all inherently worthy etc. but am wondering that if we really ACT and BEHAVE as though we respect and love ourselves and we are priceless goods and we value ourselves- will we eventually begin to feel it/develop it?

I've been told these kinds of things by my sponsor for years. It also can be said like this "Where the body goes, the mind soon follows". Does that make any sense? I have done the "acting as if" stuff and I've gotten through some pretty tough times that way. Even acting as if I had faith for God to get me through, whether I believed it or not. In the Language of Letting Go book it has some stuff on it. . .

fake it 'til you make it!

Well one thing I can tell you is when you act/feel like you are not worthy and a failure,then that is what you become. (A marter.) YUCK! So it makes some sence that it would work the other way.
D

Worked for me. ((()))

Yes. I believe it. We are what we think.

However we also need to have "realistic expectations" of ourselves.

I know I am a beautiful wonderful person :) but that does not guarantee that I will find someone to always love and cherish me , never hurt me and never leave me.

Thanks Peter!

Yes, I do believe it. Very much.

As we act differently, our self image changes.

Some call it an upward spiral.
When we start acting with respect towards self, we start pulling in others towards ourself. They see our smile and smile back. Their smile helps us realize...we are worth it.
With my spirit lifted and then seeing the impact I can have on others by sharing my smile...others start in an upward spiral.
The more I gave away, the more I grow. Service work is an important part of finding that upward spiral. Self worth grows by doing. Sitting at home on the pity pot only gains me a red ring *LOL*

ROFLMAO

anyway right on!

There is a book, "I Could Be Anything If I Only Knew What It Was" by Barbara Sher.

In a part of the book she talks about "acting as if". She says that if you 'act as if' you are __________(fill in the blank) . Then you will start to be that person. She said that actions can come before affirmations.

She tried this out with ex-heroin addicts she was working with who were trying to find employment and she said it was a very successful approach.

I don't think I've ever heard it stated more perfectly than that.

Yes, I believe that good self-esteem is a must, especially in recovery. I beat up on myself constantly, but service work helps me see that I'm worth something.

heh - yup.

I think that we associate behaviours and feelings. Just like pavlov's dog, I'm classically conditioning myself to first unlearn the false crap ingrained in my brain, then to learn what I've been dying to know all along...I am worthy, acceptable, capable.

"Upward spiral" - love it!

Hi,

Have you all heard of The Secret?

I also have a book called Ask and it is Given, it is very inspirational and very practical in giving advice and help in raising our innner vibration to one of self esteem

ABSOLUTELY!

Earthworm

John Kennedy Sr. is quoted as saying, "You ARE what people think you are."

How we think, not only about ourselves but also about what we do and do not do, does affect how we feel. Learning to block the negative thought and replacing them with positive thoughts is part of training ourselves to get rid of the garbage that can lurk in our minds. Postivie thinking and affirmations can make a huge difference in how we progress.

I used this practice today albeit in a different situation....not regarding self-esteem or not. But in the difference between what I felt like doing and what I did. It was a positive learning experience.

The route that led me to respecting myself was (1) The Golden Rule: "do unto others as you would have them do unto you; and, (2) learning that I COULD control my tongue. Thinking about what I said or refrained from saying, taught me self-control. With the tool of self-control I learned self-respect. Words are powerful. Speaking calmly and respectfully to others earned me respectful replies.

Hi there Heather,

I have :)

Here's how I did it. I took a long hard look at my grandkids, and I realized that babies are born with perfect self-esteem. They have absolutely _nothing_ unworthy in their self-image.

Well.... I was born the same way. Naked and stupid. So all of my unworthy feelings I must have learned somewhere along the way. Anything that I learned, I can un-learn. Once I figured that out then I did the "Healing the child within" stuff that you read about in all the self-help books. I talk about it a little bit here.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ner-child.html

Mike :)

I find if I start into negative thinking then I start to act negatively and then those actions will develop a life of their own. If try to take a situation and think positively and take positive actions then the situation will have a totally different outcome.


Earthworm