lolobug3

My husband is currently dry and has been for a short while. He has no program of recovery but everything is going okay. He had an affair on me which lasted 3 months and ended last February. We have been together since I was 16 (I am now 35) and we have a 16 year old daughter. He has drank our entire relationship but the last 6 years have been the worst.

I see him trying. He is being nice and just kinda normal. I just can't get the affair out of my head. He talked about it with me alot. I know more than I care to know about it. I know who the girl is. She is a barfly. I know where she lives - in a total dump. I hold him responsible however I know that the cheating has almost everything to do with the drinking and the disease. Problem is for the last couple of days I cannot stop thinking about the affair. Them together, etc., etc. It is driving me crazy. I don't even want to get up in the morning because I know these thoughts are going to be in my head. Does anyone have any suggestions for me on how I can stop this thinking. I can't talk to him about it because I have talked his ears off about it and now he gets uptight when I bring it up. There really isn't much else to talk about. You would think that since he has been being nice, etc., that I would't be thinking about this. Help please.........Thanks Lolobug