I guess im the ****** one who had to jump on the bus, i still use randomly about. but i am heading in the right direction by getting on the bus i believe. i of course wish i could just make an overnight change or be hypnotized to finish harming myself, but ive said in a previous post, im worried i might learn the hard way eventually, even though i cant see anything on the horizon, its probably the blinders im wearing. but i think the driver knows where to go so i can learn on the way.