He started again this am....why am I abandoning him? He needs my help..thought we were a team...those people are brainwashing you....I'm the only thing he has...he's tried to make me happy...what about aour marriage...why can't we work on that

I told him that it isn't his job to make me happy, and it's not my job to make him happy. I can't work on our marriage right now, because I have to work on myself first. He needs to work on HIMSELf before we can both work on our marriage. I can't fix him and I can't help him. he has to do it himself. I told him I don't want him to change for me, I don't want him to do any of this for me. i want him to do it for himself. If he decideds to change, it can't be my responsibility, that's too big a burden for me to bear. I feel bad that he is hurting ( there were tears...which is new for him). I wish I COULD do something for him, but I can't