Dear lostnotfound,
Sounds liike you did a pretty decent job! Would giving him one of the Alanon books (One day at a Time...) to read help? Maybe he can see that it's you you are talking about at the meetings and not him. (A's think they are the only thing we talk about. I think it shocked and confused my A when I told him I was working on me).
No wonder he's threatened. You're getting healthier!!!
If there are conversations you truly want to keep private, invite your mom to SR and teacher her how to use the private messenging.
I know I'd be p-oed if he read my stuff.
Keep up the good work.
best wishes,
Reikihelps