I'm not quite sure what you are asking Jen?
Your husband is an alcoholic ..... you need help ..... your kids are suffering from his alcohol abuse and your enabling behavior.
Wow, what a nice guy! So he drinks what he needs before he gets home based on your request .... what a prince. Unfortunately you all still suffer the consequences of his drinking, whether he drinks at home or not.
Go back to Al Anon .... do something. Don't you have a neighbor that can watch your kids for an hour? Try doing something pro-active for yourself ... you won't change him or fix him and soon you will be so isolated he will be all you have. Now that thought makes me shudder!