Thank you for caring and maybe I should explain why I am leaving without telling him. I have a grown daughter who is now 26 who I had to watch 24-7 around him. Yes.. he is abusive in bed at night! Over the 4th he kicked me off the bed and almost pulled my ear off. People do things when they are drunk that they would never do sober. I will not wait until he get's too drunk and does something to my daughter he will regret. I have tried to leave in the past and he cut off all my accounts and cell phone and found me at my family's house and took my car. It's hard to tell your whole life story in one paragraph.