Ain't love a bitch? I know how you feel, so I'll just give you my honest opinion.
This man has personal issues. That's Ok, we are all human and he wants to work them out. I applaud him. But, how long are you willing to put YOUR life on hold for someone else. In Alanon, I am taught over and over again, keep the focus on myself. When I keep the focus on another, THAT's when I get into trouble.
No question you have honest feelings for him. But what does your heart tell you? I have learned that for me, if I look at a problem with the pros and cons, I then think about it, and then give it (surrender) to my higher power, only then the right answer shall come back. I would love for you to be happy and things to work out. It just sounds like to me, that you may be putting your life on hold for someone else.
It's fine to keep the door open, but go on with your life. Lead it like it's new and fresh, and be open to all possibilities. Nothings fixed. All fluid, changing and open, and if it is meant to be, it will happen naturally. You needn't force anything.
Remember, you ARE powerless over others. Hard as heck to give up control, this I know for sure.
So, what's right for YOU?
Ken