albion67
Welcome! Glad you are here but sorry for your pain. I also know the feeling........my AH left me and our two children under similar conditions. He has filed for divorce after 27yrs of marriage.....he is angry at me(really, taking his negative everything and putting them onto me and the kids) so he can try to "control" his drinking........really keep drinking without the guilt.
It is very difficult and frustrating, as you well know. There is no talking, explaining,etc that will make him see what he can not. I am so glad you are here. For me, seeing that this is more about the disease than a personal rejection does help some. I imagine as a recovering A, you know all this better than I do, but it still hurts.
Congratulations on your own recovery.....that is wonderful! The frustration that you must feel knowing there is a better way for your partner must tear at your heart. Keep your own forward movement...........yes, I am sure God has His plan for you, me, all of us. Trust is sometimes so hard......why I want to hold on to these problems when I could/should give them over is beyond my reasoning.......just the human condition.
I passed a sign the other day that spoke to me, and I keep trying to remind myself of it, for I believe it to be true. It said: "RELAX: God is in charge"...... Hope today is a good one for you and your partner,too.
Please keep coming back and post often!
p.s. Alanon, "Co-Dependent No More", "Getting Them Sober" and
http://www.GettingTheSober.com all are helpful resources, IMHO