Bonbon,
Sending hugs your way! You have come a long way, but I could see how looking back would be painful. I have a very good friend that is moving out of the house that she and her A had both of their children in. She is packing and trying to leave things for him too. They divorced about a year ago, she lived in "their" house for a year and now it is his. She found a great place to live with her kids (walking distance from my house) and they are all excited, but when I called her last night to see how the packing was going she was in tears. Experiencing lots of the same feelings that you are now, but both of you realize that where you are now is much better than where you were then! My heart goes out to you both!
Constant