ayers, I know why you told him you'd move back, etc. But basically, he threw a fit much like one of your children would. Would you have given into them? Of course not. Maybe he would just leave town but you can't control his actions by giving into his demands. He went to one meeting and now has seen the light? I believe it would take a bit more for that to happen. actions, remember?
I think your head is getting there but when he scares you, you resort back to the old way of thinking. Don't let him bully you into going back home.
Also, he was supposed to be spending time with his children but instead was all over the place wanting to know what you were doing, texting you, driving by, etc.....that would have ticked me off. Tell him to take a few steps back and just enjoy the kids for a night, goodness.