Originally Posted by Fiya
Kahlia,
Thanks for those words. Her relative and I have been keeping contact and she's given us conflicting stories as to her rent money. She's not asking either of us for money. It's just in separate conversations that we had with her, she was very upset and irritable, and when asked why....she gave the reason being her rent money. But the reasons she gave to the both of us were different.
I love this woman dearly. But I'm no fool and since my experience I've received advice from people who once smoked, then quit to avoid being controlled by it and it's been years since they've touched the stuff, are doing EXTREMELY well in life, and have no intentions of doing it again. I will continue to be there for her....but not when it comes to money matters. Even now I call her often just to check up on her and will continue to do so til she tells me outright "leave me alone". If that ever happens. And I'm preparing for it.
Fiya-Glad my words were of some help to you...she has ALREADY told you to leave her alone...she is USING....she is ALL CONSUMED by drugs. She may still love you in a sick sort of way BUT it is not the kind of love you WANT , NEED, OR, DESERVE. None of us did when we did it to other people that were trying to hang in there and HOPE that we would "quit" and get better and be our "old" selves. Even if she does "quit", Fiya, she has a LOAD of work to do, to get better, to figure out WHY she even started it all in the first place, she should not even have a relationship for the first year of her clean time, it should be used to focus on HER RECOVERY. She needs HELP, real HELP, before she ends up in the ground someplace. I ended up on life support, for God's sake. It take's EXTREME measures before we will STOP. we think we are invinsible. I am in no way trying to HURT you, I am telling you the true REALITY of what you are dealing with-a woman who is too sick to love anything but her DRUG.....I hope you will think about that and I DO admire you for NOT giving her any money...you are a very smart man. PLEASE move on with your live-you DESERVE one, there are so many woman out there that are waiting for a person like you, a good person that has intelligence, a good heart, a smart mind, and most of all a caring soul.....I hope you decide to find one.....I am only trying to tell you what I know from my own addiction..I BROKE someone's heart, he did not even know the "CLEAN" me....I was totally different....he was totally different to ME.....he waited and waited and I was so sad for him that I could NOT give him what he had waited for.....PLEASE do not let that be you.........PEACE, my friend...........Kahlia