I see where you're going with it ASpouse. My situation isn't like that so I can't answer. I have complained about the negative in my situation because well, he won't acknowledge the things I know to be true, denial I guess. I have turned the other way, many times but won't anymore.
However, the negative doesn't reflect our daily life. Our daily life is how I described above. But living with the lies makes it impossible for me to rebuild trust and they eat at me.