Hi Hangin...
First, you're doing fine-you just don't know it yet.
Second, are we talking about an addict, or a cheerleader/prom queen/teachers pet???
I ask because us addicts have magical powers. It seems that when it suits our purpose we can instantly hide all the survival skills that we needed in our addiction and become helpless and needy and "I want my mommy".
Our cunning, social toughness, ability to size up situations, our entire survival instinct so necessary when using turns into straight-up Mommy manipulation.
One reason? No chemicals for false courage or instant self-esteem.
There are many others. But the person typing the posts is you, not your Daughter. So...
Unless you want to go through this again, and again, and again...
Hands Off the Addict.
She is responsible for being there and what she does while shes there. If she doesnt like the place, send her a phone card and she can call around and find another-and find a way to get there as well.
As long as you are involved in any part of this process, she does not have to take responsibility. Do you think for a minute that if she made all the arrangements, including financial, that you would have received that phone call?
Her recovery is hers, all hers.
Yours is about you.
Breathe. And again-H.O.T.A.
With love,
Jon