I'm alcoholic and don't think it's a "disease" either, in the conventional sense - except perhaps to the extent that many alcoholics seem to have heightened neuroticism (anxiety and fear) and empathy to begin with, which makes life kind of hard, hence when they experience the calming effect of alcohol or drugs it seems a blessing (at first). They are simply more susceptible.
But aside from debating the disease concept, I AM a firm believer that addiction springs from environmental factors - childhood chaos, trauma and abuse. Many good books and research on the topic. That is why it often appears to run in families - because the kids are exposed to a household filled with chaos, emotional upset, secrets (covering up for the alcoholic), multiple caregivers, inadequate planning and follow-through, etc. General dysfunction. The behavior patterns repeat for generations. And disease or not, those around the alcoholic are affected. I am still working through issues developed from my chaotic childhood and loss.. Your resentment and bottle searching are just one minor manifestation of this, and your kids will be affected too.. Hence the value of Al-Anon.
Also want to add that there are many options other than in -person AA meetings. AA also has Zoom meetings, there is Rational Recovery, SMART and we have an excellent section here (Newcomers) where alcoholics can find support. Many of us got sober here and read/post daily. But the key is they have to WANT to get sober. You cannot force it on him. So set your boundaries, get him out for the kid's sake and when he's ready maybe he will seek support.