Originally Posted by
LucyIntheGarden 
Well, he's still an alcoholic. Mr. Hyde will be showing up soon.
If you don't want to be apart, think about sparing your children, and waiting until they have graduated and gone to college, then you can go to the U.S. and live with him. It would be very sad if they had to cope with an alcoholic in their home.
My youngest child doesn't graduate for 6 more years. That is entirely unreasonable to have a long distance relationship that long. And he has to move here first, or there won't be a relationship at all. I have my own medical reasons not to move to the US right now.
Yes. He is an alcoholic.
But I want to point out that it is not a blanket diagnosis for behaviour. He had moments of Mr Hyde - yes. I will not sugar coat it - what just happened was very much Mr Hyde. But his alcohol generally turns him into Eeyore not Mr Hyde. What turned him into Mr Hyde... well was me. Not that I did anything wrong. And yes his alcohol use was to blame - I do not take the blame for this. But it was my inconsistency in setting boundaries and having consequences - I wasn't. That is how I ended up on this forum. I didn't hold him to boundaries, and so when I made a poor attempt at doing so it triggered his fear and pain and he lashed out to deflect focus on himself.