My Loved One died
My former spouse died a week ago. I had prepared myself for "that phone call" for 19 years. In my mind I knew it was a strong possibility. And told myself that repeatedly. But when I finally did get the call I always thought was coming, well my insides shattered. And it was as if I was reliving all of the sorrow and loss from the past. Praying constantly that his soul is at peace. Peace from the prison that came with alcoholism & addiction.
I joined this online group in January of 2005. I posted a lot on Friends & Family Members of Alcoholics. The members here were supportive and kind. One person was a counselor and offered some feedback. One suggested idea was for me to join Al-Anon. Well I did and continued with this online group and it's members as well. They made such a difference in my own recovery. I remain ever grateful for 12 Step recovery. I am still a member of Al-Anon. Both of my loved ones that qualified me have passed away. My Mom passed away in 2010 and my former spouse died a week ago. I still pray for them to rest in peace. The 12 Steps saved my life. The outcome in my life was not a happy one. Nevertheless, the program helped me to live healthier. Recovery was slow and still ongoing. But the members of the groups, the daily readings, going to meetings and following the steps were my life preserver. Addiction does not negotiate.