Hi ABCCuddly
I was only able to stop drinking when I finally admitted there would never be 'just one'. I insisted I could control how many I had if I used enough willpower. That attitude led me to daily drinking & a ruined life. So much misery would have been avoided if I'd only seen the truth - I can't touch the stuff - ever.
I'm happy you're here to talk things over - it really helps when we can be honest. We all understand what you're going through.