Dear Oynnet,
Your post brought me back many years to a time when I moved in with my alcoholic boyfriend. I had teenage children too at the time. At first, I was the savior; he felt so much better with me, less lonely, less anxious...all of it, and within 4 short months I became the "cause" of his drinking. He said he "drank because I didn't trust him not to". I almost had a nervous breakdown, I got out, I took care of myself and my children and I lived alone for 3 years. My alcoholic boyfriend had no one to blame but himself when I moved out.
I had no prior experience with alcoholism either at that time, but I sure did get an education. I went to Al-anon, and I found this wonderful forum. I am glad that you have found Sober Recovery as well. There is so much wisdom and experience here. I have learned that the individual stories of alcoholics and the people who love them are more alike than they are different.
I wish you the best, but I also agree that bringing this man into your family would be something you would most certainly regret and very soon.