LOL!
Maybe 'one foot out the door' should one of the characteristics of ACOA!
In my marriage, we have been together 16yrs. After alot of analyzing! I believe I shut down about 14 yrs. ago. I'm not sure what happened, but I know at that time I was "out the door" but then I found out I was pregnant. Sooo, I think I thought that this was Gods will, a message to stay. But I never could give to the relationship what I did in the beginning. And in all honesty, even with its ups & downs, it has really only gotten worse. Perhaps I am only feeling obligated to stay. Or is it like JG said, that I don't feel good enough about myself to know I deserve to be treated better.
I am the same way with my children, they are the only ones who get my undying, unconditional love...even when I am feeling hurt by something they may do. But now I wonder, shouldn't we be able to feel that way with the person who is our partner in life?