I was in a 33 year marriage and experienced the same unfortunate experience. As soon as I wanted to share my life, I was shut down. It was all about his selfish ways. I had to listen to his drunken rants but I wasn’t important enough to him to lend me an ear. I was cursed at and treated shabbily. I left seven years ago and have peace in my life and people who care about me and show it by their actions and their words. Occasionally I still come on this site. This is why: One of my children alienated me because of the split and he will have nothing to do with me. Recently I found out his wife is expecting their first child in 4 days. Unfortunately, my brain tells me I should have stayed. You would not have lost your son and your grandchild. I have to remember that I deserved better and I tried everything I could. I still struggle with self esteem, sleeping problems, etc. Not all because of the marriage. My upbringing was such that I did not recognize unacceptable behavior for what it was.