realize i do need my bi polar meds
I have come to the conclusion that I do need my bi-polar meds. when I feel stable I don't want to drink but when I am having mood swings I want to badly. since uping my meds I feel much better. I was sleeping very poorly and feeling burned out all the time. I missed my meds yesterday because I lost them and I was in tears by morning. I realize it was the product of missing my meds. so feeling good today. also I accept the reason I relapsed in the first place was a product of decreasing my meds without doctors approval. I would be manic at work and I thought I was getting better because I would feel great almost like I was high. I didn't even realize how unstable I was, i would get extremely irritable and have episodic rage, but only when i was alone. I was having regular crying spells but didn't want to admit I was sick. I felt like I was going to have a nervous breakdown. my instability was one reason I found getting sober so much harder this time. anyway I'm not doing that again.
David