DriGuy

That rather sums up my life with alcohol. I had no intention of becoming seriously addicted, and I figured I was good enough to "outsmart" it, so I just kept going. All along the way, we face these little red flags but don't quit, because we think we could if we really needed to. Addiction seems no more than a future possibility, and we lie to ourselves thinking we are not there yet. On the surface, it seems to us that we are still in control, but I believe addiction started early in our careers, because one of the most insidious symptoms of alcoholism is denial. And the transition can take place so slowly that it isn't even noticeable to a smarter person. It's comforting to deny the situation, and it's even kind of reasonable, because maybe, just maybe, we aren't becoming addicted...

We are then operating on the much lauded and hyped human condition of hope. But in my case, hope was useless because, it has nothing to do with the reality of what we are in denial about; We are having a problem with alcohol, and it's getting worse while we aren't taking it seriously, or worse yet, we aren't even noticing it. We are only "hoping" we are OK.

Then one day, it hits us full in the face, even though the problems may have started years ago. It's a hard pill to swallow, but there is a solution, which is wonderful if you can accept it. But it's hard if you would rather stay in denial thinking being an alcoholic isn't so bad. And how would you know the joy of sobriety if you never took the time to know how good it can be? You have no point of comparison, so you can end up sticking with the familiar. It's a trap! And it's a hideous one.