I'M IN!
Good to "see" everyone.
We have a holiday Monday here in the states. In the past, that would have been an excuse for a weekend of absolute crapulousness for me. Three whole days to do "whatever!" I'd start the weekend by getting the bare minimum done around the house on Saturday morning (usually somewhat hungover from the night before), so that I could feel like I didn't waste the entire holiday weekend. My younger daughter would be with her dad, usually, (older moved out of the house before things got really out of control) so I'd have no more responsibilities until Tuesday. Drinking would start in the afternoon on Saturday, and the rest of the weekend would be a blur. Sunday morning I'd be hungover, and start drinking again pretty much as soon as I could function, usually by early afternoon. Monday would be another hangover, and maybe I'd take it a bit easier that day, so that I could be fairly decent at work on Tuesday. In later years of my worst drinking, I only worked part time, so you can just imagine that I had little control on Monday, either. Most of this drinking was done in groups of "friends," so I could justify it by saying I was a "social drinker." That worked for years until I realized there was nothing social about the way my friends and I drank. It was just an excuse. When I think back on those times, I sometimes feel so much regret for the wasted time and opportunities. I can't change the past, so now, I try my best to make the most of the weekends, and the time after work each day, too. I work, I play, I have time to just relax. It's just lovely. I'm never going back.
A chapter has really closed now. I went and picked up dear Chauncey's ashes. They are in a lovely little carved wooden box, that goes inside a velvet bag that is embroidered with "Until we meet again at the rainbow bridge." I shed a few more tears, of course. The pain is lessening, but I still feel pangs of loss and grief when I get home and there is no wiggly little guy who is so happy to see me.