Originally Posted by
SadPArtner 
Similar to other ( wrong) conclusions of mine: she has strength to leave me, but not to leave the alcohol...
Thanks everybody for reading me.
Well I think if you look at it from a "normal" perspective, it can seem odd. But if you look at it from her point of view (that of a person with an alcohol and possibly other drugs problem) it doesn't seem out of place at all.
When a person is addicted to a substance, that is their first love, their first consideration, above all others. It's not really a contest because no one wins over the drug. If her excess drinking had say, just started and perhaps she was even a little alarmed by it, that's one thing - but that's not her.
I asked above if there is a history of alcoholism in her family. I see from your first post:
Finally our coexistence ended one horrible day in which the granma birthday was celebrated and she and her father were VERY DRUNK in our own house, in front of our children
I asked because the patterns you mention can be attributed to that as well. Looking for approval from men (the flirtations etc) - dropping your hand if the subject gets too heavy. stating that it was up to you to fight for her. These can all be traits of a child of an alcoholic.
None-the-less, she is on her own path and that includes drinking - a lot. If that is not your path, then this is not a relationship for you. It's not strength in parting from you, it's about holding on to the alcohol. Unless you are an addict, it's very hard to understand, it's not really a choice (to her) and it's not personal.