Originally Posted by
ToughChoices 
Hi, Jen!
I’m so glad you found us and so sorry for the situation that brings you here.
His actions over the next weeks/months/years will tell you if he is ready to be sober. If you observe encouraging changes and sobriety, and you decide to stay in the relationship, you can push pause on the divorce process.
But, typically, past behavior is the best indicator of future behavior, and his past behavior has made you (understandably) upset enough to pursue divorce. At present, the most reasonable course of action is probably to continue walking in that direction. U-turns are legal later, if they are merited. 😉
It is so hard and so sad. He sounds very ill, and you cannot love him back to health.
Take care of yourself. 💕
-TC
Thank you for responding so quickly and being so kind. Unfortunately, he has totaled a car, destroyed property , said horrible things in his stupors, lost countless jobs, lies incessantly and on and on. That past behavior is sadly who he is. I want that not to be true. I will continue with filing. It's so insane questioning myself as I type this out. Thanks again.