SeekingCalm and Trailmix,
I am so thankful for your thoughtful and sensible input as well. I have decided, with your help and SparkleKitty's help that he is in God's hands now. Paul beat the odds before. I think if he really wants to he can beat them again and get even stronger this time around. I will not be his rescuer or emotional comfort while he does the hard time. It's hard . But it's the right thing to do for him and for MYSELF. I am ready to live my life. I will love him from afar and go on with my life. I will let him know I believe in him. You are right, if he loves me as much as he says he does and wants to recover us being apart shouldn't be a problem even if it's for a year or two. Thank you for giving your time to help me work through this nightmare. Today I am feeling strong and not guilty for anything. ❤