Hey Phil,
It's doable, that's the concrete good news. Many suffering as much or even more than you have found liberation from active alcoholism. In my experience, it became clear to me that will power was not enough. I had to address the reasons that I drank and used. Once you take the booze away you are simply left with the same character defects that sent you out drinking in the first place. I call this white-knuckling it. Once you start to address and resolve those issues you can be relieved of the obsession and start to live a fulfilling life.
I also started out going to online AA meetings and it was helpful to get started, but honestly if you have in-person meetings I recommend getting there daily. If online is the only thing possible, I found that setting aside time to sit down in front of the meeting with no distractions the best approach. Nothing has the same effect as in-person meetings though.
I recommend getting a sponsor immediately. If you have not found a suitable sponsor, get a temporary sponsor and start doing whatever they ask. Get someone serious that means business and has a life that you want to be living. Work the steps. Without step work, you are just abstaining from drinking while still sick.
The kick in your ass you are looking for is: Get your ass to a meeting in person daily, get a sponsor, take a commitment at the meeting and get a homegroup. WORK THE STEPS DAILY.
Hope this helps bro, remember recovery is possible.
Do the work and always be good to yourself. Imagine how you would treat a loved one that is suffering deeply and love yourself in that way.
All the love