The 1st time I drank alcohol I drank to excess.
Every time after that I drank to get drunk. Not the taste, I hated the taste at 1st but forced myself to get used to it, not to relax, just to get drunk.
I have no idea why I just wanted more and more.
My childhood wasn't story book but wasn't horrible either.
I have no mental issues other than some anxiety.
Seems I was born with a taste for alcohols effects.