I don’t know how long you’ve been a couple, but, engagement is relatively early days in terms of a long term relationship or marriage. After 45 days sober, it would be loving and supportive if he congratulated you, and encouraged you. If trust has been broken, and you both want to work on regaining that, I agree with suggestions for counseling. Trust isn’t born out of demands and eliminating boundaries. Trust would mean he doesn’t need to check up on you. The power play is concerning. That element of the relationship might be worth exploring, in general.
I’m going to congratulate you on those 45 days, Jo! Keep it going. 💕