Originally Posted by
Kdon853 
It all starts with not drinking no matter what.it’s hard in the beginning the first 6 months were one of the toughest times of my life. You get through it. AA saved my life but the program did not come to me right away it’s a journey. I wanted that white light experience wouldn’t that be easy. Didn’t happen. I have a sponsor I’ve done the steps and life got better.
I’ve said it here before a lot of times in the first 6 months , my only accomplishment was not drinking that day. Keep it simple in the beginning.
Yea, it was rough day. I'm really depressed. Only had 3 hours asleep. I missed church because I talked myself out it by convincing myself I wasnt dressed fancy enough. Ive never been to church on Easter before, so all I could dwell on is how out of place I would feel. Familiar pattern. That was hard for me to deal with. Not stepping up the courage to stop driving around and get out the car. I ended up just taking my son to McDonald's and thought hard about buying a bottle of red wine. Just drink bottle down quickly and catch a buzz, then I'll stop for good. Crazy. I didnt buy the bottle.