Hi Pizza, when I read your quack what I thought was when he said it was a shame
there was no reconciliation, you didn't gray rock/medium chill him & it's too bad cause
that was the first bait he threw at you. Better to have said "maybe" and gone into another
room. He only said it as an intro to an argument (really just to rant at you) as to why you
won't reconcile.
I had to read the responses on the website many times before I could rattle off something
without having to engage. And, "you could be right" was the comment that would
silence my RAH when I would use it, which wasn't often
And as he continually baited you, this is a chance for you to state
"I won't discuss that right now, as opposed to telling him to stop making it all about him.
Thats pointless, and you have the right to not discuss something or set up
a time when you would like to, with ground rules, like NO yelling, each having a turn
to express their opinion, no snarky remarks, no sarcasm, the discussion is
only to come to come to a resolution of some kind.
As a mental health professional, do you interact with addicts/codependents?