Hi Holly. I remember this very well. I would wake up feeling terrible physically, and also guilty and shamed for drinking. I'd swear I wouldn't drink that day
By about 2pm I had managed to convince myself id be ok to drink just this day, I'd give up tomorrow. By 4pm I'd be in the pub
It was very confusing, tiring and in the end demoralizing
There's a couple of things. One is, if you cannot stop, to go and seek help. If you told your doctor what you've told us she should help you make the next move. You should seek medical help anyway before giving up.
But if you choose to do it in your own then planning the day to the minute worked for me. What I'd eat, where I'd go, what I'd do. And if it got all to much I'd go to my ultimate safe space (I'd go to bed) as there was no way I would buy alcohol from there
Lots of people on here will have ideas on how to plan a day (and a life!) without alcohol if you ask 👍