Originally Posted by
bcct 
I'm frustrated about where I'm at in life. That was one of the reasons why I drank. The feelgood factor of the drink made the unsatisfactory life situation feel satisfactory. Now that I'm sober I FEEL the problem, but I'm struggling with finding the energy to fix it. Don't know where to start.
I think you just hit the nail on the head. Using alcohol and drugs can be a common escape when one isn't happy with their life circumstances, whatever they may be. But what you have to realize is the endless cycle of "escaping" is only burying these feelings even more, and perpetuating the cycle. Whether you stop now or you stop years from now, to feel better you will eventually have to face these feelings head on whether you are using or not.
I think part of the drive of my using has been driven by past life experiences as a child / not being happy with life circumstances as an adult.
Now more than ever during COVID it's a challenge like it has never been. But my addiction counselor said to me once, something along the lines of you need to learn to accept life on life's terms and be able to face what reality is without having to "escape." Or find new healthier escapes that don't involve drugs / alcohol.
Things don't always go according to plan in life, sometimes we are put through hard times that we have no control of, but it's up to you how you deal with it and what you do to create the life you want for yourself.
Maybe you don't try to pick through all the feelings at once? Maybe try sorting through them gradually, at a pace that isn't too overwhelming for your mind / body? Are you working with a counselor or anyone you can talk to to help you sort it out? It really can help to have someone who can give an outside perspective on things and maybe point out something you may have slipped over or aren't seeing.
In any sense, while it may be tempting to drink, realize the more you keep going back to it the worse you are making the situation and the harder it could be to deal with these feelings / emotions. Because let's face it, when you are drinking, you are likely not dealing with the emotions you are burying them, putting them aside, because you feel good from the alcohol so figure you don't need to deal with it. Wrong.
One thing that could help is to try to find some healthier alternatives to make you feel good. For me it's exercise. I do weight training, cardio, and yoga.
Hope this helps.