Originally Posted by
Zura 
Elly I think a few of us talked about yoga. I was going to start the 30 days with Andrienne along side someone else who had just started it.....was it you who was doing that one? Anyway it did not eventuate for me. Maybe I should give it a red hot crack as I'm in a huge funk.
It was me who started yoga. I didn’t get very far. I think have done it maybe three times. I am still quite chaotic in my ability to do the kinds of stuff that many of you seem to be good at. Eg Sticking to daily schedules/plans. Eating/sleeping schedules. That kind of thing. Apart from going to meetings. Managing that one each day. ✅
TBH, I have a bit of a hate-hate relationship with this kind of structure - even though I accept it is helpful and may reduce my general level of life incompetence. And let’s be honest, I had no problem scheduling in drinking every day.
I sometimes get scared or depressed by such things in themselves. Is that all there is? Lists are just things I won’t do, schedules are things I won’t keep and both will require self-admonishment or punishment later. Even in recovery, after initially improving my disgraceful attendance and punctuality at work , last week when I was increasingly stressed, I turned up to work at 9.45am and 10am last two days of my work week and went back to skipping the fist ten minutes of work meetings. Just like the old days.
But have found some ways forward through small non-overwhelming things - like the suggestion in SR that I tackle my sad alcoholic’s house that I hate and can now see by setting a five minute timer and doing as much as I can in that time. (And usually resetting timer a couple of times because 5 mins is not enough). This breaks through my fear.
I will try yoga again today. because anxiety is back already. Dammit. So much for the peaceful brain. 😂