You said the coffee high only lasts a short time and that is what grabbed my attention. That sounds like addict thinking/behaviour. Getting a high from the caffeine. I love tea and drink caffeinated tea but I dont get a high from it. I rarely drink coffee but when I do I feel that kind of buzz. That high. I switched to decaffeinated now because the alcoholic/addict in me was attracted to that and that freaked me out.
Honestly, in my experience, I did not find myself in an AA meeting and on Sober Recovery because I had a bad hangover. I found them because I couldn't stop drinking despite all the bad consequences I had from drinking. When I put alcohol in my body I set off a phenomenon of craving so powerful I am unable to stop and have no idea where that drink will take me. But when I wanted to quit I could not stay stopped. Alcoholism IS progressive. I was in and out of AA and on many different forums for a few years before I finally surrended 2 years and 6 months ago. My last "drink" nearly killed me. Alcoholism will do that. My alcoholism wants me dead but will settle for me drunk. If you are an alcoholic you will never beat it. It WILL take you down. But you can get off of the elevator at any time.
I could not imagine a life without alcohol. I lived to drink. I can now say from my own experience that life is SO much better . Not all days are easy and and full of Rose's. But even my worst day sober is better than my best day drunk. There is so much out there ti explore/enjoy. I lived in pubs. That's where I wanted to spend all of my time. Today, I have zero desire to go into one. They hold nothing for me.
Abstinance is the ONLY way if you are alcoholic.
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