FF, I’m glad you’re 5 days sober. Congratulations.
Early sobriety is the time time to focus on your sobriety, on doing the next right thing. It’s really not the time to play whack a mole trying to tamp down or make right all the regrets which inevitably pop up one by one or in a rush of many.
If i I sound like someone who has been there, it’s because I am and I have. I’m also what we call a “double winner,” my mother was an addict. Then I had to go and become an alkie too, lol.
This friends and family forum is for people who have people like us to deal with. It’s where they go to support each other. Most of the time, I read what they have to say. To remind me that I don’t want to hurt others in this way ever again. To lend support when I can.
You will learn what you’re asking about when you really concentrate on your own recovery. If you do a program, like AA, you learn how to clear the wreckage of your past. You even learn in the right order, confronting what is hurting you so you have the strength to confront and correct what you’ve done to others.
Embrace your recovery. Stay sober. Do the next right thing. Listen and learn. The rest will fall into place, it really will.