Hey thanks for your helpful reply once again Obladi, I much appreciated your input and shall take on board reflect on what you’ve said.
This week has been good, I have stayed really busy working away on my current project. Luckily my studies keep me occupied if I really decide to put my mind to it - in the past when the clock would hit 6pm I’d zone out and open a bottle. Now too I open a bottle but just flavoured sparkling water, which keeps me satisfied and find joy that I can keep working after that point if I wish to do so.
I am not really thinking about drinking, though I went on a risky venture today meeting some friends outside for a picnic, unfortunately I can not control what people around me do and alcohol was involved but I was really proud I stuck to my soft drinks and actually had a lovely time, cracked a few jokes - everyone laughed and thought that god why have I ever thought people wouldn’t like me or that I would be boring and not fun at all without alcohol, all in all it was a really refreshing experience. When the rest moved to the pub though I had to remove myself from the situation as I knew the temptation would have been too much.
As mentioned before I anticipate next week being hard work but I feel like I am prepared, I have plenty planned and a huge project I have to prepare and lots of studying to do. I have integrated lots of exercise into my days and I am genuinely feeling content with my decision to learn to live a sober life. In the past my thoughts have been filled with self pity and “oh but I can never have this and do that again”, now I think I have finally had it and can see way more clearly why the path of drinking would be no good and only lead to misery. I can do this.